One year ago, two weeks before our 9th wedding anniversary, my wife sat me down and said she was leaving. By the end of February, she had moved out. Her decision caught me completely by surprise.
The first half of 2009 was a painful blur: there was the unexpected blow of her unilateral decision, some painful counseling that was focused on how a divorce works and nothing about reconciliation. There was negotiation about splitting assets. We walked around the house deciding who took what. Early on, I decided to seek joint custody of the two children. I wanted more than anything to shield them from my pain and ensure that they had the best opportunity to be kids and to grow up in a loving environment. It was critical to me that I take a
As time went on, I found my footing again. The pain and shock receded behind me. Every once in a while it would come rolling back like a ocean swell moving in the night, but it would always ebb away. The children proved their resiliency and are fine. My family, friends, and coworkers were always there for me, supporting me and loving me unconditionally. I reconnected with old friends. I began dating an wonderful and amazing woman who listens to me, understands me, and we have already had many adventures.
Exactly one year ago, I had no idea how my life would change when Nancy sat down across from me at the kitchen table and said “We need to talk.” My life has changed for the better.
First of all, I am thankful to Nancy for being fair and reasonable during the divorce process. I am especially thankful for my family, who are always there for me with a hot meal, help with the children, and a million other things. I am thankful for my friends, both old and new, for their fun, laughter, and advice. I am thankful for my girlfriend, who has been my angel, my advisor, my companion, and my best friend during some tough times and, more importantly, some amazingly fun adventures. Finally, I am thankful for my children, Caroline and Andrew, who bring my such joy and vibrancy to my life.
Life goes on. And I thank God for that.
12 responses so far ↓
1 On a limb with Claudia // Feb 5, 2010 at 11:04 am
Congratulations!! I’m absolutely thrilled for you!
2 Andrea // Feb 5, 2010 at 11:10 am
I’m so happy for you.
3 Reika // Feb 5, 2010 at 11:53 am
How wonderful that you have so many things to be thankful for, and it’s wonderful that only a year after such a difficult event, you can look back with grace.
4 Devyl // Feb 5, 2010 at 11:59 am
Sounds like a damn good year, all in all!
5 mccgood // Feb 5, 2010 at 12:04 pm
Thank you for being an inspiration.
6 Karin // Feb 5, 2010 at 12:56 pm
I am so happy for you. I think you have weathered the storm amazingly well and done a beautiful job shielding those angel babies from turmoil and hurt.
I hope this is the start of many, many fantastic years for you. Love you much!
7 Laura // Feb 6, 2010 at 8:47 am
Way to go, little brother. I’m really proud of how you’ve dealt with all this. And I’m glad we talk more often.
Love,
Laura
8 Mark // Feb 6, 2010 at 9:14 pm
Well said and well done. Many could learn from the gracious, courageous, and dignified way you handled this.
Love,
Mark
9 Wow, Dave, I am proud! // Feb 7, 2010 at 7:43 pm
Dave, I am amazed at how well this is written, and how heartfelt it is! I should read this blog more often, just don’t seem to find the time. I hope that some day, when you look back on this, it will all be good, and the hurt will be gone. I am so proud of you, and thankful that I get hugs and kisses from your angels. Let me know if I can help. Know that you are loved!
10 Diane // Feb 13, 2010 at 12:54 pm
I have always been amazed at how you are able to face life’s challenges with your head held high. Yo are an amazing person and I am proud to be your big sis. Being able to be there for you and your children is a blessing! I luv ya lots!
Diane
11 cajunvegan // Feb 15, 2010 at 3:22 pm
Ob-la-di, ob-la-da, life goes on, brah!…
Lala how the life goes on…
Ob-la-di, ob-la-da, life goes on, brah!…
Lala how the life goes on.
So much awaits you and you totally deserve it.
12 Bethany // Apr 12, 2010 at 9:46 pm
Dave that was very eloquent. You are a very strong person and loving father. And I know that you will never doubt that your family and friends will love and support you through anything.
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